Last week, for instance, I strolled into a room to collect my free Andrea Bocelli concert ticket and T-shirt. No mediums or smalls in sight. Just box upon box of large, XL and XXL. Being the scrawny lad I am, I left disappointed.
Why does this happen every single time?
I’m not here to poke fun at those struggling with a larger-than-desirable figure. Au contraire. I’m simply posing a question that has, apparently, stumped the brightest minds of this planet since the T-shirt screamed into popularity in the late 19th century (thanks, Europe).
The human race has done well up to this point. We’ve already solved the how-to-board-the-airplane-quickly problem, the my-table-is-wobbly problem and other civilization-crushing conundrums. Surely, then, some grand theorem exists that could save T-shirts from the waste bin?
Nope. I’ve searched the scientific literature far and wide, and nothing is to be found.