Archive for the ‘Animals’ Category

O’re the Ramparts We Watched a Park Ranger’s Taser

Sunday, February 19th, 2012

Yesterday afternoon my family and I visited Fort McHenry National Monument, where the U.S. national anthem “The Star Spangled Banner” was born in 1814.

Our visit that day started wonderfully but ended unpleasantly when a National Park Service ranger aimed his taser at my father over… (drum roll) …an alleged dog-off-leash violation.

<Insert ironic statement about the location and nature of this incident. E.g. “So much for the ‘land of the free.’”>

At right is a picture of the vicious, nasty, terrifying, 14-pound and taser-worthy hell hound named Mac.

Mac tried to befriend the offending park ranger and his backup during the incident. After they ignored him, he eventually got bored and took a nap in the grass of the monument’s spacious east lawn.

Did the park ranger abuse his authority? That’s not my decision to make — I’ll leave that to his superiors and the courts. But the fact is he aimed a weapon at an unarmed person — aka my father — and shamed his family in broad daylight in a public park jam-packed with other families.

Make no mistake, this could have been a lethal confrontation. My father is not young, and even the low-amperage jolt of a taser can spur cardiac events.

(more…)

Wyeth: The Greatest Dog Ever

Friday, April 15th, 2011

Finally, it was happening. The stars were aligning. Zeus had answered our prayers… or just my parents.

We were getting a dog.

Shortly after the grand announcement, the Mosher family piled into a car and began a long drive into the country, where the breeder lived.

She had converted one area of her ranch-style home into a tiled pee-and-poop-proof doggy den. Just beyond a barred gate, about a dozen snow-white West Highland terrier puppies wriggled about their mother. We didn’t know his name yet, but one tiny blob of cuteness pawed at the bars of the metal cage, stared at us and (perhaps I’m embellishing here) whimpered.

He was the one.

(more…)

About those penis spines

Wednesday, March 16th, 2011

Last week, tucked at the end of a voluminous list of cutting-edge science, Nature hid a gem I covered for Wired Science: Human penis spines may be a missing piece of DNA away.

Beyond the giggles, the real news is that researchers have almost certainly identified deleted portions of life’s code that guide development and, ultimately, contribute to making us the humans we are today. Bigger brains for everyone, smoother penises for guys, and all of that stuff.

I wasn’t the only one to notice. Google News shows 40 different outlets pushed something out the day embargo lifted. Yet no major outlet, to my knowledge, actually published any clear depiction of the, er, spines. (Hey — those abstract mouse penis cross-sections in the study don’t count.)

Some ethical principle of journalism is probably about to violated here, i.e. “Avoid pandering to lurid curiosity.” But in the name of science, so be it!

Below are a few pics that turned up during my research. Naturally, I take no responsibility for your NSFW activity:

(more…)

What IS this bug?

Wednesday, July 14th, 2010

praying mantis leaf insect, Phyllium bioculatumOne of my favorite courses in college was Entomology 500. The gist: Capture a crapload of bugs, mount them on pins, identify them to a species, and finally show to them off for reactions of a) abject horror or b) nerdly squeals of delight.

As much as I’d like to personally identify your mystery bug(s) for you, there’s a better way: The Internet! (What else did you expect?)

Below are some free services to which you can submit creepy crawly bug photos, and a trained expert will respond with their best identification:

  • PestControlCanada.com – A straightforward site where the curious send in their photos, and volunteer bug pros respond in a few days. Not geared for the kill-nothing Buddhist types (i.e. “pest control” in the URL), but they do have a simple setup with nice-sized images.*
  • WhatsThatBug.com – More verbose identifications than the previous site, but the concept is the same: email your bugs, get them looked at. One big difference, however, is the “Why you gotta hate on insects?” attitude, as evidenced by the “Unnecessary Carnage” section that scolds bug squashers.
  • University of Minnesota’s insect gallery – If you’re too impatient for a pro’s analysis, this is a convenient self-guided process-of-elimination tool. Trouble is, there’s only a handful of bugs — but to turn it around again, the ones you’d most commonly notice/encounter are listed. A nice start before throwing in the towel.
  • Aardvark – To get a little social media on you, Vark.com is a great service to answer tough-to-Google questions — like “what is this bug?” This is because living breathing people (including entomologists and other bug experts) are on standby to answer strangers’ questions. You’ll need an instant message program and a means to post your photos publicly, but it’s a near-instant setup.

Speaking of ID’ing animals, it’s time for a few words on species. (more…)

Ten horrifying outcomes of evolution

Tuesday, June 22nd, 2010

You’ve heard evolution is about the “survival of the fittest,”* but fitness doesn’t guarantee beautiful products.

Sometimes, carrying on your genetic legacy means replacing a host’s tongue, eating your neighbors or letting your mate liquefy every part of your body except for (eek!) your gonads.

In short: You might want to grab a barf bag, because we’re about to take a horrifying little stroll through the animal kingdom. And it’s going to get progressively un-pretty.**
(more…)

R.I.P. Scrapper cat

Wednesday, March 31st, 2010

I remember meeting our cat Scrapper for the first time 13 years ago, almost as if it was yesterday.

My mom left to make a routine at Meijer; you know, cereal, milk, cleaning supplies, etc.

She returned with those things — plus a satanic stray kitten in a cardboard box whom she found in the parking lot. (more…)