Archive for February, 2010

My brains — er, plans — have been dashed

Thursday, February 11th, 2010

I saw my brain this week on a TV screen — specifically my midbrain. It was amazing.

What technology allowed this wonder? Sonogram, aka ultrasound — yes, the same device you use to look at fetuses while they’re in the womb. I was under the impression that I could take video and photos during the procedure.

"I has a sad." - kittehWhich I did.

Unfortunately, life plays terrible tricks on science-obsessed little boys named Dave Mosher.

By posting my images and video (or posting any identifying information for that matter), I was later told that I’d probably violate the study’s institutional review board (IRB) protocols. And could thus jeopardize the very important and exciting research going on.

Ugh.

In the name of science I’m going to withhold my multimedia goods, and regroup on the blog post I’ve already written. I’ll have to strip any identifying anything from it — so, a sort of “Mad Libs” of the brain.

Check back soon, and I’ll hopefully have something good worked out…

Photo courtesy of ICanHasCheezburger.com

The misbehaving computer or: Confessions of someone who thought he was awesome, and was not

Tuesday, February 9th, 2010

You want to be awesome at something nerdy? Simply follow my Five-Step Program to Awesome™:

  1. First step: Admit that you know nothing about that nerdy something, no matter how much you think you know. Yes, you are dumb.
  2. Second step: Attend Google University diligently — possibly a real university if you have this rare thing called money — until you are feeling quite awesome.
  3. Third step: Just when you think you might be awesome, try the nerdy something and fail unexpectedly.
  4. Fourth step: Accept how utterly non-awesome you are. Yes, you suck.
  5. Fifth step: Repeat first through fourth steps. A lot.

Take, for instance, building computers:

I built this very machine on which I type from a hodgepodge of parts, starting about two years ago.* (true nerds can click here) Everything was “cool” until about October of last year, when a vexing problem presented itself:
At seemingly random times, the damn thing would freeze up, repeat a fraction of a second of audio that was playing for about a minute, and then carry on as if nothing had happened. And freeze up again a random increment of time later.

Right up until this past weekend, this was life at the Dave Mosher bachelor pad, and a crushing blow to my nerdish psyche. In my family, I am the unofficial technology guru. The super dork. The ultra geek within your bloodline that you call when you’re too broke (or thrifty) to even consider hiring a gun to fix that wickedly complex pile of doped silicon, whirring motors and glowing beeping delicate thingies. And here there I was, confounded by my own electron-infused baby.

Something awesome, however, saved the day… (your cue to keep reading) (more…)

New York’s Subway Air Sniffers

Wednesday, February 3rd, 2010

That weird device in New York City’s subway system from the previous post? It’s an air quality monitor.

After a few dead-end phone calls and e-mails to the NYC DEP, I finally walked up to a police officer at the Union Square precinct, which is just a fart away from the machine (pun intended). Rough transcript of our conversation:

Me: Excuse me, what the heck is that machine out there?

Cop: It’s an air testa’, you know, to make sure there nuthin’ bad we’re breathin’ in.

Me: Do you know what it’s looking for or measuring, specifically?

Cop: Bad stuff. Stuff you don’t wanna breathe in.

Me: Like radon? Or aerosols? Or…?

Cop: Bad stuff, so we don’t get hurt down here.

Thanks for that explanation, because I had previously thought to myself, the subway is full of wonderful-smelling, healthy air particles. Such as brake dust, excrement, urine, vomit, etc.

Captain obvious aside, Cosmopolitanaut Kaylen also verified this conclusion in my previous post. She would know. She processes the data they generate.

But even Kaylen raised the point: how does it work? (more…)